As the school holidays approach (or may already be underway), many parents and caregivers begin to feel the pressure of trying to manage everything. Juggling work, family life, household responsibilities and the need for rest can create a unique kind of stress that’s easy to dismiss and brush off as expected, but very real in the impact it has.
If you’re feeling stretched, torn between competing demands, or simply unsure how to balance it all, you’re certainly not alone; it’s a struggle that’s raging in the majority of households up and down the country. The good news is that with a bit of intention, some
flexibility, and a lot of self-compassion, it is possible to take care of everything and still find space to enjoy this time.
Here are a few thoughts and tips that might help you navigate the weeks ahead.
1. Reframe ‘Productivity’
Many of us carry internal expectations around about how ‘productive’ we should be, even during a time that’s traditionally associated with rest and play. If you’re working while your children are home, your capacity may understandably be reduced. That’s not a failing – it’s a natural response to increased cognitive and emotional demands.
Rather than holding yourself to your usual standards, consider what a realistic workload and success rate looks like for this season. What absolutely needs to be done? What can be deferred, delegated, or scaled back? Setting boundaries around your time, and communicating those boundaries clearly, can reduce guilt that can build up, and help others know what to expect from you too.
This mindset shift from “doing it all” to “doing what matters most” can be a powerful way to reduce stress and help you feel more in control.
2. Gentle Structure To Support Everyone’s Wellbeing
Unstructured time can sound relaxing, but for many families (and individuals) it can also lead to dysregulation, especially for younger children who thrive on the routines they know in term time. Creating a daily rhythm – not a strict schedule, but a flexible one – can support everyone’s mental wellbeing.
We suggest:
- Set a simple routine for how a day will flow: your work time, their play time, meal times, time that will be spent together.
- Include children in the planning, even in small ways, to give them a sense of ownership.
- Pick some independent or quiet-time activities for children that will only be available for them during certain times, especially during your work blocks – it keeps those activities interesting.
- Schedule micro-breaks for yourself, even if it’s just ten minutes of mindful breathing,stretching, or sitting with a cup of tea.
It doesn’t have to be perfect. Just creating a loose framework of what activities will happen when can help reduce the fatigue that comes from constant decision-making, and give you a sense of predictability.
3. Embrace Imperfection – It’s Part of the Process
If there’s one message we should all repeat to ourselves, it’s this: you don’t need to be perfect to be effective, loved, or worthy. During the holidays, it’s very easy to fall into the trap of comparison, especially when social media is full of curated snapshots of family outings, homemade crafts, or picture-perfect picnics.
All families have their messy moments, and nobody has it together all the time. There will be bickering, boredom, moaning, and plans that don’t go quite right. They’re not failures; they’re the fabric of a real, connected life.
When things feel chaotic, take a few deep breaths and a remember: “This doesn’t need to be perfect to be valuable”. It can make a real difference to how you experience the day, and how others around you experience the day as a result.
4. Prioritise Your Own Needs Too
On that very note, it’s easy to place your own wellbeing at the bottom of the list during school holidays. But your ability to stay present, patient, and calm is directly linked to how well you’re looking after yourself, and how that impacts those around you. As the saying goes, you can’t pour from an empty cup.
Think about what you need to feel emotionally replenished during this time. It might be moments of solitude, physical movement, connection with other adults, or simply not having to make yet another decision.
Whatever it is, see if you can give yourself permission to prioritise it – not as a luxury, but as a vital part of your wellbeing. If it helps, talk to a partner, friend or family member about how they can support you in creating that space.
5. Remember – This Is a Season, Not a Standard
Lastly, it’s helpful to remind yourself that the school holidays are just one season of the year, and they are finite. You don’t need to achieve and maintain peak performance, perfect harmony, or non-stop entertainment.
Some days will go well. Others will feel overwhelming. Both are normal. What matters most is your ability to reconnect – with yourself, your children, and your values – after the wobbly moments.
Be kind to yourself, and realistic about what this summer can look like. Then you can start to relax into it a little, accept the moments of chaos, and embrace the moments of joy.